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Apr. 20th, 2007 01:24 pmI HAVE TOO MUCH YARN.
But I still want more.
I slept in a really awful position last night, and I've done something to my back. It's not pleasant. But hey, I'm a little old woman anyway, so the chronic back pain was inevitable. Right?
I cannot fucking make up my mind what I want to do with my hair. It's driving me crazy. It's long enough now that I have to do something, but it can't stay long. When it gets this long, it starts getting so heavy that it starts hanging straight down and loses the wave, which just makes my face look massive. So, I either have to cut it short again, or curl it.
I really actually still want the loose perm, but I'm terrified of getting it done. Perms are so easy to fuck up, and I have a problem with being forceful when it comes to hairdressers. I got talked into the worst blond highlights once just because I couldn't say no to the girl. Lately, I've been sticking to the same stylist since I know she won't fuck it up, but since she's the senior stylist at the place I go to, she's a bit expensive.
Screw it. Maybe I'll just buy some rollers and start sleeping in them. There you go! Let's add curlers to the whole arthritic back/knitting needles/yelling at youngsters thing. Yay!
Y'know, the older I get, the more I realize that men can never win. When I spend time hanging around men my own age, I'm shocked to hear how romantic they've all become. All of a sudden, they're all wanting love and comfort and companionship. And it just makes me sigh, because the timing is all so wrong. You take a group of men in their mid to late 20s, and they're starting to want to settle down. But the majority of women my age nowadays are broken. Most of us don't want to be involved in anything serious for various reasons - we're starting careers, we're fighting with bigger choices than we were at 19 - I don't know, it just seems like such bad timing.
Maybe I'm wrong, maybe the women I know aren't typical women. I just know that I've spent the last 5 years being disappointed over and over again by men, and it's really only going to take one more bad experience for me to just quit and concentrate on building a solo life. And I'm surrounded by all these sweet, idealistic men who can't understand how I got there. I see it happening just the same for other girls I know.
I wish that I could trust men the way that they want me to trust them now. It really sucks. But when I try to date them and pretend that I'm not fucked up, it only ends up hurting them.
Isn't that sad? I suppose it's no surprise that these men end up with girls under 21 who haven't been fucked up yet, while we women end up sleeping with married men in their 30s.
But I still want more.
I slept in a really awful position last night, and I've done something to my back. It's not pleasant. But hey, I'm a little old woman anyway, so the chronic back pain was inevitable. Right?
I cannot fucking make up my mind what I want to do with my hair. It's driving me crazy. It's long enough now that I have to do something, but it can't stay long. When it gets this long, it starts getting so heavy that it starts hanging straight down and loses the wave, which just makes my face look massive. So, I either have to cut it short again, or curl it.
I really actually still want the loose perm, but I'm terrified of getting it done. Perms are so easy to fuck up, and I have a problem with being forceful when it comes to hairdressers. I got talked into the worst blond highlights once just because I couldn't say no to the girl. Lately, I've been sticking to the same stylist since I know she won't fuck it up, but since she's the senior stylist at the place I go to, she's a bit expensive.
Screw it. Maybe I'll just buy some rollers and start sleeping in them. There you go! Let's add curlers to the whole arthritic back/knitting needles/yelling at youngsters thing. Yay!
Y'know, the older I get, the more I realize that men can never win. When I spend time hanging around men my own age, I'm shocked to hear how romantic they've all become. All of a sudden, they're all wanting love and comfort and companionship. And it just makes me sigh, because the timing is all so wrong. You take a group of men in their mid to late 20s, and they're starting to want to settle down. But the majority of women my age nowadays are broken. Most of us don't want to be involved in anything serious for various reasons - we're starting careers, we're fighting with bigger choices than we were at 19 - I don't know, it just seems like such bad timing.
Maybe I'm wrong, maybe the women I know aren't typical women. I just know that I've spent the last 5 years being disappointed over and over again by men, and it's really only going to take one more bad experience for me to just quit and concentrate on building a solo life. And I'm surrounded by all these sweet, idealistic men who can't understand how I got there. I see it happening just the same for other girls I know.
I wish that I could trust men the way that they want me to trust them now. It really sucks. But when I try to date them and pretend that I'm not fucked up, it only ends up hurting them.
Isn't that sad? I suppose it's no surprise that these men end up with girls under 21 who haven't been fucked up yet, while we women end up sleeping with married men in their 30s.
