god, i'm masochistic.

I decided I could no longer make fun of the Twilight series legitimately without reading the books, or at least attempting to read them. I know, I know - a crazy, near-suicidal mission. Believe me, I understand. But I'm slogging through nonetheless. I just want to be justified in my hatred, you know?

So far, I'm about 100 pages into the first one.

It.

Is.

So.

Boring.

Seriously. NOTHING HAS HAPPENED. Edward has saved Bella's life like, three times, and apparently she falls down a lot and smells good. She figured out he was a vampire because of the Internet, and has zero problem with this. Doesn't get worried, doesn't think, oh no, vampires are scary - nope. Just goes with it.

Pages and pages of her daily life. Descriptions of every class period, clothes, music, hairstyle, augh. Nothing fucking happens. I'm skimming most of this thing, luckily.

This book makes the Sookie Stackhouse books seem thrilling and well-written. SERIOUSLY. I mean, even those books have things happening in them! Shit goes down! Yes, we get to read 5 pages every chapter devoted to Sookie getting dressed and ready for the day, but shit, even that isn't this bad.

Thank god I didn't pay for these things.

yep, i'm crazy.

Just finished the second Twilight book. Still mostly skimming.

My verdict so far - the first one is GODAWFUL. Just fucking terrible. The second one, while still stupid, actually has redeeming qualities to it. This Jacob character isn't all that bad at the moment. And Edward is MIA for most of this book, which already makes it better.

I still don't get it, though. There's no fucking plot to be seen anywhere. And Bella will NOT SHUT UP about being a vampire. She has done one of two things only during these entire two books:

1. Fall down and get hurt.
2. Whine about wanting to be a vampire.

I don't know if I can make it through the next two books. My curiosity is mostly sated at this point - I feel totally justified in hating this shit now. But we'll see.

Bleh. I need a shower.